The 15th Line
A Play Of Brief Communication
by Jeremy Gable


A NOTE ON TWITTER STYLE

CAST OF CHARACTERS

SETTING

ACT ONE: CITIZENS

JANUARY 25TH

PATRICK: Breaking News - Subway accident at 15th St Station.  21 believed dead, 17 injured.  Cause is not yet known.

SETH: Just witnessed a subway accident.  And I just ran away.  I didn’t know what to do.  I’ve never been so scared.

DUSTIN: I keep hearing about this accident.  And Erica’s still not answering her phone. She does this a lot.  I wish she wouldn’t right now.

ANGELA: At the hospital.  No major injuries.  The doctors are calling me a miracle.  A miracle would have been walking to school instead.

DUSTIN: She’s still not answering the phone.  I’m going to the hospital.  I know you hate Twitter, Erica, but if you read this, call me.


JANUARY 26TH

PATRICK: Confirmed - 15th Line subway accident kills 29, injures 22.  Subway line closed until further notice.

SETH: Taking a taxi to school today.  Yesterday keeps playing in my head.  Keep reading about people who stayed and helped.

ANGELA: So...yes, I was in the subway accident.  I’m feeling okay, just really really sore.  I’m leaving the hospital today.

ANGELA: And I can go to class tomorrow.  I didn’t go today.  Or yesterday.  So I probably should.

DUSTIN: Erica’s in critical condition.  Please send her your prayers.

PATRICK: Mayor Hodgins holds press conference; promises a full investigation into 15th Line subway derailment.


JANUARY 27TH

SETH: I am Cheerios, plain and simple.

SETH: I meant to say I am EATING Cheerios, plain and simple.

DUSTIN: I canceled all appointments today.  Erica’s condition is up in the air.  I hate the unknowable.

ANGELA: Dear everyone...Stop asking if I’m okay.  I’m okay.

PATRICK: City Press wants to hear from witnesses of the subway derailment.  Contact me for more info.

SETH: @pattycitypress I saw the crash.  What would you like to know?

PATRICK: @turnbullseth Were you one of the ones who helped out?  Tell us your rescue story.

ANGELA: I totally zoned out in class.  I just sat and stared.  It all sounded like a foreign language.  I don’t know what happened.


JANUARY 28TH

PATRICK: Did President Obama’s State of the Union address help diminish our nation’s fears?  Read our analysis in today’s City Press.

ANGELA: Three days since the accident, and Brandon hasn’t called.  I guess I know now that we’re done.  Cross that loose end off my list.

DUSTIN: I just declined a newspaper interview.  I can’t possibly say anything right now.

PATRICK: @turnbullseth We’d love to hear your story, if you still want to tell it.  You can Direct Message me if you want.

SETH: @pattycitypress No, never mind.  Don’t worry about it.

SETH: Keep hearing about “the heroes”.  What makes these people “the heroes”?  When was being safe not the courageous thing to do?

ANGELA: The newspaper just interviewed me.  Again, the word “miracle” was used.  I’m a miracle.  If only my poo could cure cancer.

PATRICK: @angiannini89  Great interview today, Angela.  Look for it tomorrow.

DUSTIN: Thanks to everyone for all of your prayers.  You can stop now.  It’s all over.

PATRICK: Breaking News - The death toll for the 15th Line subway derailment has risen to 30.


JANUARY 29TH

PATRICK: Read today’s City Press for an interview with Angela Giannini, miracle survivor of first car in 15th Line subway accident.

ANGELA: So, I’m totally a celebrity now.  However, I barely remember the accident.  Come to think of it, I barely remember the interview.

ANGELA: And hey, there’s the text from Brandon!  Funny how the universe works, isn’t it?

SETH: One of the subway crash survivors is in my American Pop Culture class.  Why didn’t I know that?  Oh yeah, because she didn’t tell me.

PATRICK: Check today’s City Press for stories from witnesses of the derailment, including a high school class that helped in the rescue.

DUSTIN: Thanks to those giving love and support.  And to those criticizing me for mentioning Erica’s death on Twitter, leave me alone.

DUSTIN: I’m not saying you’re wrong, but leave me alone.


JANUARY 30TH

PATRICK: @angiannini89  So, did you like the interview?

SETH: I need to do something heroic.  To make up for my cowardice.  Any damsels in distress out there?

ANGELA: @pattycitypress Yep.  It was cool.  Thanks!

ANGELA: Someone just called me a hero.  I’m guessing because I didn’t die.  The definition of hero is pretty broad, huh?

ANGELA: Aaaand someone just called me a prostitute.  It all comes around.  Thanks, Tiff!

PATRICK: @angiannini89 Glad you enjoyed it.  And you are a hero, not a prostitute.  :-)

DUSTIN: A quiet house.


JANUARY 31ST

PATRICK: Transit Authority reports 15th Line subway trains will run tomorrow; cause of derailment is still unknown.

SETH: @pattycitypress  Is there a way to volunteer with the investigation?

ANGELA: Someone asked me why I’m not more affected by the accident.  I dunno.  Anyone care to answer for me?

PATRICK: @turnbullseth  No official call for volunteers yet.  You could give blood at the hospital, perhaps.

SETH: @pattycitypress Okay.  If you find out any way to directly help, please let me know.

DUSTIN: I don’t want to go to work, but I want to do SOMETHING.  How would Therapist Me help Mourning Me deal with this?


FEBRUARY 1ST

PATRICK: 15th Line subway trains are now running while investigation into the cause continues.

ANGELA: Thank god the subways are open.  This whole walking thing?  Not for me!

SETH: Don’t think I’m ready to take the subway just yet.  My funds can support one more cab ride.

ANGELA: Creepy!  The subway station has caution tape everywhere, and it smells like death.  But hey, the subway’s working again!

DUSTIN: I’m going into work today.  I think I can do this.

ANGELA: Okay, what just happened?  I’ve never passed out before.  I woke up on the floor of the subway station.  So weird.

ANGELA: Seriously, I’m really weirded out right now.

PATRICK: @angiannini89 Are you okay?

DUSTIN: I can’t do this.  I’m heading home.


FEBRUARY 2ND

ANGELA: I’m fine, everyone.  I’m fine.  I am fine.

PATRICK: No word yet on whether the groundhog saw his shadow.  With record-breaking temperatures, let’s hope he did.

SETH: @pattycitypress I saw my shadow.  Does that account for anything?

ANGELA: I’m going to Tiff’s party tonight.  Hopefully that will take my mind off of yesterday (of which I’m FINE!!!)

PATRICK: @angiannini89 Glad to hear you’re doing better.

PATRICK: Will this final season of “Lost” answer all of our questions?  Read our analysis in today’s City Press.

SETH: Going to give blood at the hospital today.  I’m getting over my fear of needles.  Let’s make this happen!

DUSTIN: Erica and I watched “Groundhog Day” on this day every year.  I don’t know if I should keep the tradition going.

SETH: Because I spent a summer in England as a kid, Red Cross says I can’t donate blood.  Seriously?  I can’t even donate blood now?

PATRICK: @angiannini89 Have fun at your party.

ANGELA: @pattycitypress Um, thanks.

DUSTIN: I’m watching it.  I think I need this.  Something funny.


FEBRUARY 3RD

ANGELA: Sooo, that party sucked.  I had to talk way too much about the accident.  Oh sweet Yuengling, you never judge me!

SETH: I forgot how good “Spider-Man” is.  Off to rent the rest of the trilogy.  Why can’t I be bitten by a radioactive spider?

PATRICK: Mayor Hodgins to introduce new city budget plan.  More details on City Press website later today.

DUSTIN: Last night was the first time I cried at “Groundhog Day”.  And now I can’t stop.

DUSTIN: This isn’t good.  I’m using up too much personal time.  This doesn’t instill confidence in my patients.

SETH: Okay, riding the subway home.  Wish me luck.

SETH: So, I made it home alive.  Glad to know whatever derailed the train is gone now.

ANGELA: Goddammit!  I just heard the subway from the sidewalk and I started crying.  What the hell?


FEBRUARY 4TH

ANGELA: I got another text from Brandon. I really cannot deal with this right now.

SETH: @angiannini89 Hey, it’s Seth from your APC class.  Noticed you haven’t been lately.  Is everything okay?

SETH: @angiannini89 So, I just went back and read your last few updates.  No answer to question necessary.  Hope you’re doing okay.

DUSTIN: Daytime television is depressing.  I don’t want to be a nurse, and I don’t want to sell my gold for cash.

DUSTIN: Although I don’t know what else I’m going to do with Erica’s jewelry.  I hate looking at it, and I’m definitely not wearing it.

ANGELA: @turnbullseth Ha!  Yeah, I’m already on the road to failing my classes.

DUSTIN: This is ridiculous.  I know that this is ridiculous.  I shouldn’t be sitting here.  I know this.

DUSTIN: And yet, here I am.

PATRICK: Pick up tomorrow’s City Press for a collection of stories from witnesses and survivors of the 15th Line subway accident.

SETH: @angiannini89 Well, if you want a study buddy, just let me know.



FEBRUARY 5TH

DUSTIN: Jesus, the house is a mess.  And I was the clean one!  I’m cleaning the house today.

PATRICK: Yesterday was the coldest February day our city has had in 39 years.  Temperatures will stay steady throughout next week.

DUSTIN: I accidentally broke a plate.  It’s the first time I’ve felt any amount of exhilaration in a while.

DUSTIN: I just broke all of the plates.

SETH: Man, this city is dirty!  Oddly enough, I had to stop riding underground tunnels to see this.

DUSTIN: And I’ve sold Erica’s gold for cash.  Glenn Beck would be proud of me.

ANGELA: So I’ve only been to school eight out of thirteen days so far this semester.  I’ve promised myself that I’ll go on Monday.

ANGELA: But right now, it’s Friday!  And Friday begins with F!  And F stands for Fail!


FEBRUARY 6TH

PATRICK: @angiannini89 Would you be available for a follow-up interview?

ANGELA: @pattycitypress Sure.  Do you still have my phone number? 

DUSTIN: I’m getting ready for Erica’s funeral.  None of this feels real.  I keep hoping she’ll come out of the shower any minute now.

PATRICK: @angiannini89 Actually, I was hoping that this time we might meet in person.  Would tonight work?

DUSTIN: A closed casket is the saddest thing in the world.  I want everyone to leave.  But I can’t say that, can I?

ANGELA: @pattycitypress I’m sorry, but I’m having dinner with someone tonight.

SETH: Totally saved an old lady from drowning!  I’m a hero!

SETH: That is, if you replace “an old lady” with “my popcorn”, “drowning” with “burning” and “hero” with “loser”.

ANGELA: Brandon, where the hell are you?  I’m not eating this dinner by myself.


FEBRUARY 7TH

PATRICK: Who are you rooting for in the Super Bowl?  City Press wants to know!  Reply back with your answer.

SETH: @pattycitypress The Saints.  Or the Colts.  We’re not playing.  Therefore, it’s just a collection of dudes knocking each other down.

DUSTIN: Erica’s mother needs to stop calling.  Now.  Right goddamn now!

ANGELA: Thanks, Brandon!  I give you a chance, and this is what you do!  I want to be stronger!  This is the last time you make me cry.

DUSTIN: I know you lost a daughter, but I lost something worse.  At least it seems that way to me right now.

PATRICK: We’re hard at work confirming rumors of a possible upcoming transit strike.  More details to follow.

ANGELA: @turnbullseth If you read this today, can we get together and review what I missed?

SETH: @angiannini89 Take a guy away from his football?  Just kidding.  I just sent you a direct message with my contact info.

DUSTIN: Nobody try to call me.  My phone doesn’t work anymore.


FEBRUARY 8TH

PATRICK: Transit Workers Union is threatening strike over proposed cuts in public transit safety measures.  No comment from Mayor Hodgins.

SETH: @angiannini89 Last night was fun.  Do it again sometime?

ANGELA: @turnbullseth That would be kewl.  I still think I’m going to fail this class, though.  But whatever.

ANGELA: I can’t believe I’m the type of girl who writes the word “kewl”.  I’m so sorry, Mommy.

DUSTIN: Erica used to try to distract me from the Super Bowl.  Watching it uninterrupted made me realize how boring it actually is.

PATRICK: Pending transit strike, pending budget plan, pending warm weather.  Our city is full of pendings.

SETH: Tomorrow is another study meet-up with @angiannini89, who may just be awesome enough to get me out of my funk.

SETH: And who is able to read that last comment.  And now it’s not deleting.  Crap, I’ve become my parents with technology!


FEBRUARY 9TH

ANGELA: Jesus, can I please have one day where I don’t wake up crying at 3 a.m.?  This is getting ridiculous!

PATRICK: @angiannini89 Anything I can do to help?

SETH: @angiannini89 Do you still want to get together tonight?

DUSTIN: I listen to people waste their petty troubles on me.  but I haven’t met anyone yet who has looked their own mortality in the face.

ANGELA: @turnbullseth You were at the accident, right?  Is it okay if we talk about it rather than study?

SETH: @angiannini89 Just call or text with where and when.

DUSTIN: I got a speeding ticket today.  I wasn’t even aware of how fast I was going until the officer asked.

DUSTIN: Turns out it was 110.

SETH: Transit Authority finally replied to my e-mails: “No further volunteer work needed in regard to 15th St subway accident...”

SETH: “...However, we have several other helpful volunteering opportunities.”  Yeah, I think I’ll pass.


FEBRUARY 10TH

ANGELA: I’m going to take @turnbullseth’s suggestion and talk to other people who were at the accident, or were affected by it.

SETH: @angiannini89 I’m glad to hear it.  And whenever you want to talk, I’m a call away.

PATRICK: @angiannini89 I have a lot of connections to other survivors and witnesses, if you want them.

DUSTIN: I need to stop missing my own therapy.  Otherwise I’m going to end up unloading on my patients.  Like I did yesterday.

ANGELA: Is it bad that this school costs $10,000, and I don’t give a shit about it anymore?

SETH: The city is cold, and everyone just seems so angry.  I wish I could do something to make it all better.


FEBRUARY 11TH

PATRICK: @angiannini89 If you still need any names, just let me know.

SETH: Some jerk just stole five bucks from me and challenged me to a fight!  I’d like to say I victoriously reclaimed my fiver.

SETH: But instead I ran away.  How do guys in action movies deal with the stupid randomness of life?

ANGELA: @pattycitypress If you have it, could you direct message me contact info for a woman who was in the first car named Erica?

DUSTIN: More and more, people’s voices are starting to sound like Charlie Brown’s parents.  “Wah wah wah!”  Shut up.  Just shut up.

PATRICK: Patrick Hearson to the rescue!

ANGELA: @dustykinder Are you the husband of Erica Kinder?


FEBRUARY 12TH

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 Yes, I was.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 Yes, I am.

PATRICK: @angiannini89 Did that info help?

ANGELA: @dustykinder I believe I talked to your wife right before the accident.  I’m sorry for your loss.

PATRICK: City Press wonders...Do you have plans for the upcoming Valentine’s Day?  Write us back and let us know.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 Thank you.  I read your story.  I’m sorry for what must have been a terrible ordeal.

SETH: Can’t get subway fare this morning because of my newly stolen five bucks.  I should’ve stood up for myself.

SETH: Maybe I’m just like everyone else.  Just too scared to interact with everyone else.  Hooray for the modern age, huh?


FEBRUARY 13TH

DUSTIN: I can’t watch “Lost” anymore.  It’s making entertainment out of a horrible tragedy.  There’s nothing entertaining about that.

PATRICK: No comment from Mayor Hodgins on public transit safety measure cuts.  Transit strike looking more like a possibility.

ANGELA: @dustykinder I don’t mean to pry, and I don’t want to bring up bad thoughts, so you can totally say no if you want...

SETH: Maybe the answer is someone who can restore hope in the city.  Someone who can get us to talk to each other again.

ANGELA: @dustykinder ...but would it be okay if we got together and talked about what happened?

SETH: A hero.




FEBRUARY 14TH

PATRICK: Breaking news - Driver of derailed 15th Line subway train found dead in apartment.  Cause believed to be suicide.

PATRICK: Also, Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone!

SETH: @angiannini89 Sorry if last night was weird.  I don’t normally do that.  I was on a bit of a natural high last night.

ANGELA: @turnbullseth It’s okay.  I just need some time.  Anyway, we shouldn’t talk about it here.

SETH: @angiannini89  Oh.  Right.  Sorry.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 I guess we could meet.  I don’t know what help I could be.  Did you have a date in mind?

PATRICK: @angiannini89 So, do you have any plans for Valentine’s Night?

ANGELA: @dustykinder How about tonight?

ANGELA: @pattycitypress  Sorry, I have plans.


FEBRUARY 15TH

SETH: Spent my Valentine’s Day coming up with a plan.  You’ll all find out about it soon.

DUSTIN: I actually made some human interaction last night.  I’m proud of myself.  You should be, too.

ANGELA: @dustykinder I’m proud of you.  That was a nice chat.  If you ever need to talk again, just call me anytime.

SETH: This design is flexible, warm and hard to spot in shadows.  It’s perfect.  Now how do I make it?

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 Thanks.  I might take you up on that offer.

PATRICK: A transit worker strike would affect 5,000 employees and 850,000 commuters.  Read today’s City Press article for more information.

SETH: Off to do research.


FEBRUARY 16TH

PATRICK: Coroner confirms that the driver of 15th Line subway derailment committed suicide.  Workers Union close to striking.

SETH: The city is terrifying at night.  I have a great deal of fear to get over if I’m going to make this work.

ANGELA: If I’m having trouble eating, what am I throwing up?

ANGELA: And why can I not stop thinking about the accident when I barely even remember it?

ANGELA: I’ve never considered therapy before.  But then again, I’ve never randomly cried an entire day for no reason.

SETH: If Half-Life taught me anything, it’s that a crowbar is an excellent weapon.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 If you need therpy, you know a great therapist.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 By that, I meant me.  Also, I don’t know what “therpy” is.


FEBRUARY 17TH

ANGELA: @dustykinder If you’re willing to cut me a break financially (poor student and all), I’d consider it.

ANGELA: @turnbullseth Hey, are we still study buddies?  I have some massive catching up to do.

PATRICK: Transit Workers Union will strike at midnight if safety measure cuts are not eliminated from proposed city budget.

SETH: @angiannini89 Yeah, definitely.  Just say where and when.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89  I can discuss a discount program.  Call my office to set up an appointment.

SETH: Really hoping a transit strike doesn’t happen.  Why can’t the world revolve around me just once?

SETH: Waiting for @angiannini89 at Starbuck’s.  This vanilla bean frap isn’t going to drink itself.  *TWIDDLES THUMBS*

ANGELA: @turnbullseth Crap!  I’m on my way!  Worst study buddy ever!


FEBRUARY 18TH

PATRICK: All subway, bus and trolley lines are closed today, due to Transit Workers Union strike.

SETH: Shit.

SETH: @angiannini89 My profanity was referring to the transit strike.  Not last night.  Last night was great.

SETH: @angiannini89 By the way, I think I left my phone at your place.

ANGELA: @turnbullseth  Direct message me!  Don’t talk about it here, please!

SETH: @angiannini89 Yeah, I’m dumb.  Sorry.

DUSTIN: Is it stupid of me to consider a seance?  Frankly, anything that would let me talk to Erica again would be worth it.

ANGELA: Please leave my personal life alone, everyone.  It’s called a personal life for a reason.

PATRICK: @angiannini89  So I shouldn’t run tomorrow’s article about your personal life?  Ha ha!  Just kidding.


FEBRUARY 19TH

PATRICK: How are you getting around during the transit strike?  City Press would like to know.

SETH: @pattycitypress  Rickshaw.  It creates jobs, helps boost the economy (actually, taxicab and good ol’ walking).

SETH: @angiannini89 If I haven’t stuck my foot too much in my mouth, can we meet again tonight?

ANGELA: @turnbullseth  Sure.  Did you get that, everyone else?

DUSTIN: I called a psychic, but hung up when he answered.
 You think I’d be smarter than this.

DUSTIN: Maybe not smarter, just less desperate.  But I guess not, huh?

SETH: Sewing is not easy.  I guess that’s why they invented a machine.

ANGELA: @turnbullseth Stop before you hurt yourself.  I’ll come by and help.  Because I’m womanly like that.


FEBRUARY 20TH

SETH: @angiannini89 You look beautiful today.  Just so you know.

ANGELA: @turnbullseth Yeah, you’re a dork.

SETH: @angiannini89 Guilty...as...charged.

PATRICK: Transit Authority says derailment was driver error.  Transit Workers Union claims poor equipment maintenance.  What do you think?

DUSTIN: I cannot be driven by the desire to see my wife again. 
And yet, I keep watching our home videos.

DUSTIN: I was told there’s never a reason to re-watch your wedding video.  Well, I found one.

DUSTIN: This is a bad idea.


FEBRUARY 21ST

PATRICK: Our poll shows commuters overwhelmingly blame the driver for the 15th Line derailment.  The investigation is still open.

DUSTIN: So, I just realized there are no buses on the streets.  No one told me about the transit strike.  I’ve really been out of it.

SETH: The outfit is finished.  I look ridiculous.  But I guess that’s the point, isn’t it?

ANGELA: @turnbullseth Wait, were you serious about what that was?  Um...wow, getting ready for Halloween early?

SETH: @angiannini89 Yeah, something like that.


FEBRUARY 22ND

SETH: I walked by striking transit workers.  They are damn brave to endure this cold all day long.

ANGELA: Off to my first therapy appointment.  I’ve never been good at talking about my problems.  So this should be a blast!

PATRICK: Another day of record-breaking temperatures.  Also, Fox News declares global warming a scam for record-breaking number of days.

SETH: Talking to the transit workers made me realize that I’m on the right track.  The city needs to be cleaned up.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 So, pretty painless, huh?

ANGELA: @dustykinder Yeah, my hair and teeth remain mostly intact.  That Cognitive thing should really help.  Next week?


FEBRUARY 23RD

PATRICK: Read today’s City Press update on the survivors of the 15th Line subway derailment.

ANGELA: @pattycitypress Um...what the hell was with that article?

PATRICK: @angiannini89 You didn’t like it?

ANGELA: @pattycitypress Did you really have to tell the entire city that I’m going to therapy?  That I’ve been to once?

PATRICK: @angiannini89 I’m really sorry about that.  Can I buy you lunch to make it up?

SETH: I think I’m ready to test it out.  Tonight’s the night!  Wish me luck!

DUSTIN: @pattycitypress I believe that you need to print a correction.

ANGELA: This day sucks.  I’m done with this day.  Goodnight, day!


FEBRUARY 24TH

PATRICK: Go to the City Press website for a retraction of yesterday’s article about the 15th Line subway derailment survivors.

ANGELA: @pattycitypress  Thank you.  And yes, you can buy me lunch.

SETH: So I patrolled the streets last night.  I didn’t come across any crime.  Maybe I’m not as needed as I thought.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 So, are we still meeting tomorrow?

ANGELA: @dustykinder Sure.  Otherwise, we might keep the entire city in suspense.

ANGELA: I'm having a patty melt with @pattycitypress. And don’t think he's not making the most out of that pun.

ANGELA: Sooo, heading home.  Feeling weird now.  Thank god for short lunches.

SETH: Trying again tonight...after making adjustments to this outfit.  Either that or chop off of my shoulders.


FEBRUARY 25TH

PATRICK: @angiannini89  Thanks for the patty melt with the Patty me!

ANGELA: @pattycitypress Never gets old.

SETH: So I didn’t stop any crime last night.  But I did defend myself against two guys who tried to beat me up.  So that’s progress.

SETH: But then again, they were really drunk, so I did have the upper hand.

DUSTIN: It’s enlightening to talk to someone who actually has a great deal of weight on her mind.  And in her mind as well.

ANGELA: @dustykinder The confidentiality’s sweet, but I think the entire Twitterverse knows that it’s me.  We’re amongst friends.

SETH: Patrolling again tonight.  I’m starting to think I’m just a moron in a costume.  Insert your own joke here.


FEBRUARY 26TH

SETH: Yes!  Victorious!  I actually saved someone getting mugged last night!  But then they ran away.  But still, SUCCESS!!!

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 Ah, I didn’t realize that we’re all family here.  Nice to meet you all, random strangers.

PATRICK: Mayor Hodgins says transit safety measures will be re-evaluated in city budget.  No word on when strike will end.

PATRICK: @angiannini89 So, lunch.  You and me.  I won’t take no for an answer.

ANGELA: @pattycitypress I’m sorry to give you the answer you won’t take.  I’m meeting with my Study Buddy tonight.

SETH: @pattycitypress Yeah, she’s with me!  In a way that isn’t really with me.

ANGELA: Can I stop being owned by people?


FEBRUARY 27TH

PATRICK: Mugging last night stopped by masked man spotted prowling around South neighborhood, not connected to city police.

SETH: I’m famous!  I should come up with a name.

SETH: The Tunneler!

ANGELA: I really hate not waking up in my own bed.  I know whose room this is, but my brain is not comprehending these four walls.

SETH: @angiannini89 It’s the Papa Roach poster, huh?  I’d defend it, but there’s no goodly reason why I still have it on my wall.

SETH: The Roacher!  The Exterminator!  The Papa?

ANGELA: @dustykinder Hey, I know I don’t have an appointment today, but can I still come by?

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 I get off at 4:25.  Swing by.

SETH: Okay, so every possible name sucks.  Maybe I’ll just be a nameless shadow.

SETH: The Shadow!

SETH: Wait, already taken.


FEBRUARY 28TH

ANGELA: I really want to be friends with my therapist.  So I don’t think I get the point of therpy.  Still, he’s keeping me sane.

SETH: @angiannini89 I’m not doing that?

ANGELA: @turnbullseth You leave in the middle of the night wearing a weird costume and carrying a crowbar.  So...no.

PATRICK: More reports of the crime-fighting masked man wielding a crowbar.  Have you seen him?  If so, tell us where.

SETH: Is the newspaper guy not following me anymore?  I can’t believe my loser alter ego hasn’t been revealed yet.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 I’m not going to live down the “therpy” thing, am I?  Not cool.  Funny, but not cool.


MARCH 1ST

ANGELA: I’ve been remembering more of the accident lately.  I can’t even use the word scary.  It’s too trivial of a word.

SETH: Amazing how easy it is to stop crime.  So far, guys just run away when they see me.

SETH: A subconscious reaction from growing up in a comic book driven society?  Or just being freaked out by a man in tights and a mask?

SETH: Also, a lot of people want to shake my hand.  I could really get used to this.

PATRICK: Overwhelming community anger over the transit strike grows.  Many striking workers met with shouts and threats.

PATRICK: @angiannini89 So, what does a guy have to do to see you again?
   
DUSTIN: I only have three photo albums and one video of me and Erica.  Just a handful of memories to last me the rest of my life.


MARCH 2ND

PATRICK: Eggs, shoes thrown at striking transit workers.  Transit Authority calls for police protection.

ANGELA: So, the fact that I was standing on the subway train may have been what saved my life.  I remember planting my feet on the wall...

ANGELA: ...because the train was turning over.  There was a lot of noise, both from subway and passengers.

ANGELA: I was the only one who was standing, and I was the only one who survived in my car.

ANGELA: @dustykinder God, I am so sorry for what happened to Erica.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89  Thank you.  Having you around is making everything a little easier to tolerate.

SETH: Everybody’s angry with the transit workers.  But they’re just looking to be safe.  They need protection.

SETH: They need a hero.


MARCH 3RD

SETH: Taking the day off school and providing protection for the transit workers. I haven’t done daytime work yet. Should be interesting.

PATRICK: Councilwoman Anna Cerne and Masked Man join the transit worker strike.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89  I realize yesterday’s update might have been a little weird.  My apologies.  I shouldn’t have smoked all that weed.

ANGELA: @dustykinder  Wait, really?

DUSTIN: @angiannini89  No.  Sarcasm doesn’t work in text, does it?

SETH: These people are amazing!  And the assholes stop yelling when I come around.  My reputation is preceding me.

ANGELA: The guy I’m kinda-sorta-not-really seeing is on the news in a superhero outfit.  Yep, this is where my life is right now.

PATRICK: @angiannini89 Wait, THAT’S who Masked Man is?  Wow, I suddenly feel a whole lot better about myself!

SETH: Is Masked Man my name now?  That totally blows!  I could’ve come up with Masked Man.


MARCH 4TH

SETH: So, “Masked Man” is making another appearance at the workers strike.  Seriously, I can’t come up with my own name?

ANGELA: Last night, I dreamt a woman was staring at me, and what I can only describe as brain fluid was leaking out of her nose.

ANGELA: I woke up and realized that I had seen that right in front of my face a month ago.  How do I make this go away?

SETH: That’s right, suckas!  You keep running!  They say they’ll be back, but I’m pretty sure it’s just jibba jabba.  Foo!

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 I had an appointment cancel if you need/want to stop by.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 But if you don’t need/want to, I completely understand.  It’s your call.

PATRICK: Mayor calls off police protection for striking transit workers, despite pleas for security.


MARCH 5TH

ANGELA: Okay, these dreams need to stop!  I don’t want to see bone sticking out of skin!

ANGELA: Why wasn’t there anything wrong with me?  Why did I survive?

SETH: It’s much quieter at the strike than the last couple days.  I think I’m really making a difference out here.  It feels nice.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 It was good to see you again yesterday.  I hope I was able to help.

ANGELA: @dustykinder Totally.

ANGELA: @dustykinder So, you have the day off, and I don’t have your home number, and this may totally be breaking every rule, but...

ANGELA: @dustykinder ...can I see you?  Not as a patient, but as a blip on the radar of your non-professional life?

PATRICK: Breaking News - Striking transit workers attacked by violent group.  More details to follow.

PATRICK: Breaking News - Police have been called in to offer protection to striking transit workers.

PATRICK: Breaking News - Riots have broken out at 15th St station between transit workers, police and angry commuters.


 

MARCH 6TH

PATRICK: In the wake of riots, strike is settled between City Hall and Transit Workers Union over the night.  Transit lines will open today.

SETH: Today’s my sister’s birthday.  I celebrated by telling her how I got beat up in a riot yesterday.  Happiest of birthdays, sis!

DUSTIN: On the long list of mistakes I’ve made in my life, last night was by far the worst.

ANGELA: @dustykinder I’m sorry.  That was my fault.  It was a stupid suggestion, and led to some bad decisions on my part.

SETH: @angiannini89 Wait, what happened?  Call me, please.

SETH: Ass kicked.  Heart broken.  My city and my girl both betrayed me.

SETH: But then again, isn’t that supposed to be part of the superhero story?

PATRICK: @angiannini89 So, is it over between you and the superhero?


MARCH 7TH

PATRICK: All public transit lines are open today, putting an end to a record 17-day strike.

DUSTIN: I have never done this with a client before.  This goes beyond unprofessional.  I don’t know what to do from here.

PATRICK: Read today’s City Press for a profile on Seth Turnbull, a.k.a. Masked Man.

SETH: @pattycitypress Hey, thanks for showing me for the loser that I actually am, dude!

SETH: Well, there goes my Marvel franchise.

ANGELA: It’s time to crawl back into my hole.  Why did I ever leave in the first place?

DUSTIN: I am considering resigning.  This is what one does in these situations.  At least, so Nixon taught me.


MARCH 8TH

PATRICK: @turnbullseth Was there something you didn’t like about the article?  I didn’t print anything untrue.

PATRICK: Weather is finally warming up after a wave of record-tying/breaking temperatures.

SETH: When I’m not sore anymore, I’m going get back in the game, and try not to let the way-too-honest article get to me.

ANGELA: @dustykinder Don’t you dare resign!  Seriously, I will hate you forever if you throw away your career over this!

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 I already threw away my career.  That broke all professional protocol and betrayed my marriage.

ANGELA: @dustykinder I am so sorry for what I did, but let me be the one to be punished, not you.

SETH: @angiannini89 So, can we get together and talk about what’s going on?

ANGELA: @turnbullseth I don’t even know what’s going on myself, but yeah.  Can I come by tonight, or will you be out fighting crime?

ANGELA: That was the weirdest question I think I’ve ever asked.


MARCH 9TH

SETH: Sorted some stuff out last night with @angiannini89.  Don’t know how long it will take to get back to normal.  C’est l’amour!

SETH: Well, not l’amour.  More like l’a-like.

DUSTIN: I put in my two weeks notice today.  My resignation is official on March 23rd.

ANGELA: I hate this.  I hate this so much.

SETH: @angiannini89 Look, I’m sorry I said “l’amour”!

SETH: @angiannini89 I just realized what you were referring to.  Just ignore me.

PATRICK: @angiannini89 If you need anyone to talk to, I’m here.  I promise it’ll all be off the record.

DUSTIN: Quiet house again.  The year has barely started, and it’s already a resounding disappointment.


MARCH 10TH

ANGELA: Wow, can I re-do this semester?  This ranks in the top one worst couple months of my life.

PATRICK: @angiannini89 I’m sorry to hear that.  Can Patty me buy you another patty melt to cheer you up?  Just let me know.

SETH: Okay, tonight is the night.  Back on the streets, fighting the good fight.  But first, a LOT of stretching.

DUSTIN: I feel like I’ve let everyone down.  And I mean literally every single person that I’ve come in contact with lately.

ANGELA: @dustykinder You haven’t let me down.  If anything, it’s the other way around.

SETH: Okay, kids, I’m off.  Tony Stark revealed that he’s Iron Man, and that doesn’t stop him from kicking global ass.

SETH: But then again, he did build an amazing multi-function suit.  And he’s charming.  And he’s filthy rich.

SETH: And he’s not real.


MARCH 11TH

PATRICK: Transit Authority inconclusive as to the cause of 15th Line subway derailment; investigation ends with no conclusion.

SETH: Well, that didn’t work out so well.  Second time in one week I’ve been punched in the face.  Thanks, @pattycitypress!

PATRICK: @turnbullseth I don’t know that my article is to blame.  You didn’t keep the city safe last night?

SETH: @pattycitypress Nope.  Because nobody’s threatened by an English major wearing lycra.  All my mystery, intrigue?  Gone.

ANGELA: @turnbullseth  Rest assured, Seth, you threaten me all the time, with or without the lycra.

SETH: @angiannini89  Wow, check out that sense of humor!  Welcome back to the world of the living, darling.

DUSTIN: I’ve been spending all day telling my patients to seek new counseling.  Perhaps the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.


MARCH 12TH

PATRICK: The strike is estimated to have cost the city $400,000 a day.  Is it easy for commuters to forgive and forget?

ANGELA: @dustykinder  Please answer my calls.  You can’t just cut someone off in the middle of CBT.  You at least owe me that.

SETH: Hey, assholes at school...Yes, I tried to be a superhero.  Yes, I’m back to being a loser.  Can we all get over it now?

DUSTIN: @angiannini89  I think it’s best if we just don’t communicate for a bit while I figure stuff out.

ANGELA: @dustykinder  Well that’s tough shit, because I’m still your friend, and you can’t get rid of me.  So deal.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89  Look, I just need to be left alone to figure stuff out.  I have referrals for your CBT that will be able to help.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 Please, do this for me.


MARCH 13TH

SETH: @angiannini89 You weren’t at class yesterday (shocking!) so I took some notes for you (shocking again!)

ANGELA: @turnbullseth Thanks.  I’ll come by.

SETH: I have no super-awesome mechanical suit, no amount of wealth and no Downey Jr.-like looks or charm...

SETH: ...but I do have Angela in my life, and she makes Gwyneth Paltrow seems like a troll.

DUSTIN: I’m taking a break from socializing for a while.  I need to get some things straight.  Sorry, people who don’t really care.

ANGELA: Okay, I’m riding the subway today.  I’m over this shit.  I’m getting back to normal.

ANGELA: There!  I owned that subway train!  My war flashbacks were minimal, and I dealt with it.  Suck it, PTSD!

PATRICK: @angiannini89  Congratulations!  Can I buy you dinner to celebrate?

ANGELA: @pattycitypress Thanks for the offer, but I really don’t think it’s a good idea.  The whole journalist-subject thing.


MARCH 14TH

PATRICK: @angiannini89 Okay, I’m just going to show you all my cards.  I like you a lot.  You’re beautiful and an amazing person...

PATRICK: @angiannini89 ...and I think we’re really compatible, and I can offer you much more than other guys.

SETH: The hell is that supposed to mean?

PATRICK: @angiannini89 I really think we can make this work, if you’re willing to give me a chance.

ANGELA: @pattycitypress  Seriously, I’m not interested in a relationship right now, and I just need you to leave me alone right now.

ANGELA: @pattycitypress I hope you can respect that.

SETH: I feel like I’m watching a really awkward situation.  I feel even worse about eating popcorn while watching.


MARCH 15TH

PATRICK: @angiannini89  Seriously?  You sleep with your therapist and that stupid superhero guy, but you won’t give me the time of day?

SETH: @pattycitypress First off, stay out of her personal life.  That is a really low blow and I’d like to think you’re better than that...

SETH: @pattycitypress And secondly, I’m a stupid superhero IMPOSTER.  Check your facts.

PATRICK: @angiannini89 @turnbullseth My point exactly!  This guy?  This guy???

ANGELA: @pattycitypress  Okay, you really need to back off right now.  This makes me not want to see you.

ANGELA: @turnbullseth Funny, but you’re not helping.

SETH: I need to stop getting so much enjoyment out of this.  I need to get back to having a life.  Maybe join some sort of group?


MARCH 16TH

PATRICK: @angiannini89 If you’re already not wanting to see me, how does what I said change anything?

ANGELA @pattycitypress I promise you, I’m a mess right now.  Unless you’re a specialist in Cognitive Behavior Therapy, I’m not worth it.

PATRICK: @angiannini89 I’m sure that’s not true.  Besides, is @turnbullseth really getting you through therapy?

SETH: @pattycitypress @angiannini89 Sexual healing.  It’s good for her.  Makes her feel so fine.  It’s such a rush.

PATRICK: @turnbullseth That’s just inappropriate and degrading.

SETH: @angiannini89 More than telling the entire city that she’s in therapy?  Your move, bitchlicker!

PATRICK: @turnbullseth I printed a retraction to that article, asshole!

ANGELA: I just need to look toward my goals today.  I can deal with all of this crap if I just look toward my goals.

ANGELA: What are my goals?


MARCH 17TH

PATRICK: Happy St. Patrick’s Day (or St. Me’s Day)!  Check out City Press website for a list of events throughout the city.

PATRICK: @turnbullseth My employers told me to apologize for yesterday’s remarks.  Consider this my official retraction.

SETH: @pattycitypress Oh, all hail the Mighty Retractor!

SETH: @pattycitypress I’m caught in your retractor beam!

SETH: @pattycitypress I drove a re-tractor at the re-farm!

ANGELA: @turnbullseth Wow, getting started on the festivities early?

SETH: @angiannini89  Ty-tee-ty-tee-ty!!!  Why aren’t you here?

ANGELA: @turnbullseth I’m not feeling up to loud noises or crowds.  I promise not to take your lucky charms.

ANGELA: I’m stuck between a stalker and a leprechaun.


MARCH 18TH

PATRICK: Stay tuned to City Press website for an interview catching up with subway derailment miracle survivor Angela Giannini.

PATRICK: @angiannini I don’t think you should turn down my interview.  You don’t want to disappoint the readers.

ANGELA: @pattycitypress That’s an asshole move!  I don’t care about your readers!  I’m not talking to you!  Please leave me alone!

SETH: @pattycitypress Oh hey, you dropped this.  Here you go.  It looks like a clue.

PATRICK: @turnbullseth Shut the hell up!  This doesn’t concern you!

SETH: @angiannini89 Hey, does this concern me?

ANGELA: @pattycitypress @turnbullseth Can both of you please just stop it???

SETH: @angiannini89 Sorry.  You’re right.  I’m sorry.


MARCH 19TH

PATRICK: Check out City Press blog for an honest profile on “miracle” Angela Giannini and “superhero” Seth Turnbull.

ANGELA: @pattycitypress You made me out to seem like a slut!  What the hell is your problem?

SETH: @pattycitypress Are you even allowed to say “asshole” on a news blog?  And no, I don’t live with my parents!

DUSTIN: @pattycitypress Patrick Hearson, my name is Dustin Kinder, and I’ve been a reader of the City Press since I was a kid...

DUSTIN: @pattycitypress ...I have always enjoyed the comprehensive and detailed coverage that the Press gives to the city that I love...

DUSTIN: @pattycitypress ...but your juvenile antics may have reversed 129 years of award-winning journalism. I have known Angela Giannini...

DUSTIN: @pattycitypress ...for over a month, and in that short time, I’ve known her to be a person in need, dealing with a great amount...

DUSTIN: @pattycitypress ...of sadness and fear over her unimaginable experience, but still filled with unending compassion...

DUSTIN: @pattycitypress ...and caring for her fellow man.  For you to degrade her simply because she won’t date you is not journalism.

DUSTIN: @pattycitypress It is gossip, which is below your profession.  As for Seth, while his story may be an easy target for jokes...

DUSTIN: @pattycitypress ...he’s done a great service to this city by trying to fill it with hope.  I think you should look in the mirror...

DUSTIN: @pattycitypress ...compare yourself to these two fine people, and realize that the only human thing to do at this time is resign.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89  By the way, I’m back.

SETH: @dustykinder *CLAP* ....... *CLAP* ..... *CLAP* ... *CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP*


MARCH 20TH

PATRICK: @dustykinder Well, you don’t have to worry about me resigning.

PATRICK: After today, the City Press will no longer be in need of my services.

ANGELA: @dustykinder Did you figure everything out?

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 Not even close.  But I no longer taste the gun barrel in my mouth.  Which is a step in the right direction.

ANGELA: I’m re-thinking this whole living in the city while going to school thing.  It’s time to figure out what to do with my life.

SETH: @angiannini89  Can we talk about this tonight?  I’ve been feeling the same thing.

SETH: I realize that I’ve never truly thought about my future.  Like, REALLY thought about it.

SETH: Great, @angiannini89, now you’ve got me thinking!  This is not a brain that likes to think!


MARCH 21ST

SETH: Had a long talk with @angiannini89 last night, and it’s been decided.  I’m doing the Peace Corps.

SETH: Also talked to my parents.  Dad actually seemed impressed with my superhero antics.  Mom just thinks I’m wasting my tuition loan.

SETH: Which I guess I am.

PATRICK: I have made every phone call I can.  No one’s hiring.  Newspapers have taken a real nose dive over the last few years.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 Did you contact Dr. Wheeler?

ANGELA: @dustykinder I did.  She’s fine.  Not as good as you were, but she’s helping.

SETH: It looks like I bombed today’s exam as well.  So I think this whole higher education thing isn’t working out so well.

ANGELA: @turnbullseth At least you showed up.  I probably couldn’t even find my way to the school any more.

DUSTIN: I’m ready for my last week of being a licensed therapist.  Today is the first day of the rest of I’m such a cliche.


MARCH 22ND

PATRICK: I don’t know what I’m going to do.  There’s no way I can get hired by anyone.

PATRICK: And I have no idea what else I can do as a profession.

PATRICK: But hey, at least I’ll have health care.  Right?

ANGELA: Is it better to stick it out and bumble through my education, or to be a quitter and take care of whatever’s bugging me?

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 I’m sure that Dr. Wheeler is doing a great job.  But I know that CBT is not really her area of expertise...

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 ...so I can still meet with you if you want.  Just some freelance consultation.

ANGELA: @dustykinder Let’s talk about it.

ANGELA: Screw it, I’ll be a quitter.  School’s not going away.  And I need to figure out what I’m doing.

SETH: I just applied for the Peace Corps, hoping for Community Development in Eastern Europe.  Now comes the nine month wait.

SETH: Maybe I don’t need to be a hero right now.  Maybe I can just try to be a human being, and that will be enough.


MARCH 23RD

ANGELA: My parents did a good job hiding their disappointment in my deciding to drop out.  They understand the accident did a number on me.

ANGELA: I don’t think my survival had anything to do with fate.  I think it just happened.  Just luck.  I’m lucky.

ANGELA: I really am.

DUSTIN: I’m taking a trip to London next month.  Erica was born there, and wanted to take me.  I guess, in a way, she is.

ANGELA: @dustykinder  I really hope you enjoy yourself.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 I think I will.  It may be the first time I enjoy something in quite a while.

PATRICK: This blows.  I don’t know what I’m going to do.  I wish I hadn’t ruined my life over this.

SETH: @angiannini89 So, have you given any thought to the Peace Corps?

ANGELA: @turnbullseth I don’t know yet.  I probably should, but I just don’t know.  Can we talk tomorrow?

SETH: @angiannini89 You got a small window of opportunity, lady, and it’s slowly closing with every passing second!!!

SETH: @angiannini89 Just kidding.  Yes, we can talk tomorrow.


MARCH 24TH

PATRICK: I want to thank everyone who followed me and made my time at the City Press a wonderful experience.

PATRICK: And to everyone else, I apologize.

DUSTIN: Yesterday was my last day of employment.  I hate to be the optimist that says this is the best thing that ever happened to me.

DUSTIN: But why the hell not?  I still have life in this body.  So who cares?

SETH: Just heard about a man who jumped in front of a subway train.  Public transit just cannot get a break, can it?

ANGELA: I have to get a job.  Which I guess means that I have to figure out what I’m good at.  Suck.

SETH: @angiannini89 So, I don’t know if you heard about the guy who jumped in front of a subway today...

SETH: @angiannini89 ...but they think that it was @pattycitypress.


MARCH 25TH

ANGELA: I don’t want to think I’m responsible for Patrick’s suicide.  There’s been too much death around me these past two months.  

ANGELA: It’s time to Etch-A-Sketch all of this.

ANGELA: @turnbullseth I can’t do the Peace Corps right now.  I’m sorry.

ANGELA: @dustykinder Hey, I think I’m cool sticking with Dr. Wheeler.  But I’m grateful for everything that you’ve done to help.

SETH: @angiannini89 You’re still the Pepper Potts to my Tony Stark.  That was the lamest thing I’ve ever said.

ANGELA: @turnbullseth  No.  No, it’s not.

DUSTIN: @angiannini89 No worries.  I wish you nothing but the best of luck.

DUSTIN: This must be the final stage of grief.  Acceptance.  Now if only it felt more accepting.

SETH: Not a coward, not a hero, not a lover, not a friend.  What does that make me?  That’s not a riddle, I’m genuinely confused.

ANGELA: It feels like everything’s gone off the rails in the past two months.  But now I feel ready for the next part of my life.

ANGELA: I just wish I knew what that was.